Avoiding Conflict

Your wedding day is supposed to be magical and special, full of love and joy, but all too often, drama creeps in and conflict abounds. Here’s a few easy ways to avoid conflict on some hot-button issues.

How to avoid conflict…

When choosing bridesmaids: Whether you agree or not, there are probably a few people in your life who will naturally assume they’re going to be a part of your wedding party. Ultimately, this decision is up to you and you should never feel bullied into including someone in your wedding. Adding additional bridesmaids or groomsmen adds more stress (in keeping track of everyone), more expense (in the cost of gifts and rehearsal dinner), and, well, more people to the day. However, if you’re fearful that excluding someone will cause more trouble than it’s worth, there’s no hard and fast rule on the number of bridesmaids you can have. Or, simply ask that person to serve in another way, such as a program attendant, scripture reader, or honorary bridesmaid.

When determining the guest list: Narrowing down your wedding guest list can be tricky business, especially when you’re working hard to include friends, family, co-workers, and guests of your parents and future in-laws, but if you’re working within a budget, most likely, trimming the guest list is an absolute necessity. To avoid drama, allot a certain number of invites for your parents and in-laws. Then, sit down with your fiancé and begin categorizing your potential guests into lists based on importance and closeness. Worse case scenario, send out a first round of invites, wait for RSVPs, and then follow up with a second round of invites to less-close acquaintances.

When deciding whether or not to invite children: Choosing to host an adults-only affair, especially for your reception, is completely legitimate, but before you make the decision, think long and hard about the implications. If you have close relationships with a lot of children (i.e. nieces, nephews, cousins, friends with young kids), it might be hurtful to exclude them from your day. However, if you’re worried about your beautiful reception turning into a scene from Chuck E. Cheese, don’t back down on your stance about keeping the guest list to 18 and over. Instead of including the words “adults only” on your invitations, simply be sure to write only the names of invited guests on the envelopes (i.e. Mr. and Mrs. Smith, as opposed to the Smith family). If you notice that a family RSVPs for more guests than you included, simply call them and explain that the affair is strictly for adults.

When trying to involve your fiancé in the planning: Men often take a backseat when it comes to wedding planning for a number of reasons. Maybe they don’t care about floral arrangements, maybe they’re at a loss for what to do, or maybe they simply don’t realize you need or desire their help. Whatever the case, if you’d like your groom to get more involved in the wedding plans, simply explain to him how much you’d like his help. More importantly, give him specific tasks that he can coordinate, such as planning the honeymoon, choosing the playlist for the reception, or overseeing the food selection for the rehearsal dinner or reception.

first three steps of wedding planning

First Three Steps of Wedding Planning

First Three Steps of Wedding Planning

Here’s the first three steps in your countdown to “I Do!” Get started now by tackling these first wedding planning tasks.

So he popped the question…now what?

Unfortunately, for most newly engaged women – the excitement of finally finding “the one” is dampened by a hard dose of stress and anxiety. Sure, you’ll find about a gazillion wedding planning checklists out there, but they all tend to overwhelm more than they help, and all essentially fail to address the fundamental question: “Where do I begin?”

We’re here to help. After you’ve announced the exciting news and taken some time to bask in your newly engaged glow, it’s time to get cracking. Here are the first three wedding planning tasks you absolutely must accomplish before anything else.

Cross these items off your wedding checklist – and you’re on your way.

First Steps of Wedding Planning:

Step 1: Determine Your Budget

Every decision stems from the wedding budget. Before you can plan anything, you must know how much you can spend and who plans to contribute. Your budget will determine the type of wedding you can have – from how many guests you invite, to where and when you host your wedding, right down to the specific blooms in your bouquet. And with the ever increasing cost of weddings, financing the event is often a group effort; the bride’s parents no longer need to take out a second mortgage just to fund the upcoming nuptials. You’ll need to talk to your families about who will pay for what, and arrive at a total wedding budget. This complete wedding budget tracker will walk you through the process.

Step 2: Tackle the Guest List

Some “checklists” suggest setting a date and commencing other wedding plans before this step, but Elegala considers the guest count is the most vital decision after the budget. Here’s why: Capacity is one of the most important criteria in finding a suitable wedding venue – more so even than style and vision – and you must secure your location before you can successfully plan anything else. Trust us, cramming 300 people into a venue that seats 150 will not go over well. You don’t need to have the list finalized just yet, but you’ll need an estimate from both sides of the family (and yourselves) right away to avert countless planning headaches down the road.  This complete wedding guest guide will help you get started.

Step 3: Set a Site and Date

Only once you have an estimated budget and guest count can you begin searching for a place to hold your event with any accuracy. Remember – many reception sites book over a year in advance, so you really can’t decide on a wedding date until you have officially booked your venue with a signed contract. Find as many reception sites that meet your budget, capacity and overall style quotient as you can. Use our wedding reception site search to find venues in your area, and narrow down your list. Then schedule appointments to tour each wedding venue and meet with the manager. After that—it’s decision making time.

There is one wedding planning truism that we hold dear. As you may have heard it said, once you find your wedding venue, everything else falls into place. Once you have accomplished these steps, you will find the rest of your planning task list a piece of, ahem, wedding cake.

source: elegala.com