How to Handle a Momzilla

Brides often get a bad rep for being bridezillas, but the mother-of-the-bride can be just as demanding and troublesome. If your mom (or the mother-of-the-groom) is getting a little out of hand, use these simple tips to help save the peace at your wedding.

Warn Others

If you are dealing with a Momzilla, don’t keep it a secret. Warn your wedding planner and other vendors. They can help you handle a Momzilla who is interfering with your wedding plans, and they will appreciate knowing in advance what to expect. For instance, if you don’t tell the DJ to ignore all song requests from your over-involved mom, you may end up listening to all of your mother’s favorite songs at the wedding instead of the songs you and your fiancé requested. While you should consider your parents’ opinions, the day ultimately belongs to you and your fiancé.

Plan Ahead

If you know you will be dealing with a Momzilla, make plans before she can interfere. For instance, if your Momzilla will be too outspoken about the dress you wear, go shopping with friends to find the perfect dress. Then take your mom back to see the gown once you have made a decision about the dress you want.

Keep Her Busy

Momzillas want to be involved, and they will be very offended if you don’t take any of their suggestions. To avoid an argument, choose a task that isn’t too important to you and assign it to the Momzilla. This could be something simple like creating the welcome bags for out of town guests or something more involved such as the rehearsal dinner. Giving the Momzilla a job will not only make her feel involved, but it will also keep her busy so you can get more important planning done.

 

Happy wedding planning, and best of luck dealing with your Momzilla.

Pinterest: Pins of the Week

We’re not sure if it’s a pre-spring sweet tooth a post-Valentine’s Day crash, but this week on Pinterest, we were all about cakes.  And surprisingly, we noticed a trend with our cake pins.  Lately we are all about the sweet and simple.


Back to Basics
.  We couldn’t help but appreciate the surprising simplicity of this wedding cake: white, two tiers, smooth fondant, and minimal extras. In an age of giant cake competitions and a pop culture craze for ultimate cakes, we kind love how classic and simple this cake is.

 A Cake Ball Cake.  This cake upped the ante and went for a fun double effect, cake with cake balls.  And though the concept might sound a little strange, we’re loving the effect.  The subtle ombre and the awesome sense of texture keep it interesting, but not the slightest bit overworked.  Now we’re just wondering how difficult that cake is to cut!

Perfect for a Petite Fete.  Though we love a big party, we can also appreciate a smaller, more intimate gathering.  And if that’s the case, why mess with a multi-tier cake?  Go for the unexpected yet simple.  The decadent chocolate pour adds just the right touch of pizzazz, and we think this cake would be perfect for an afternoon celebration or a romantic garden party.  Love this cake, but not quite sure if it’s “wedding” enough?  Think about it for a bridal shower, family luncheon, or morning after brunch treat!

How To Tell If Your Wedding Budget is Too Strict

Everyone knows weddings can be expensive, and unless you happen to have parents (or in-laws) who are millionaires, wedding planning typically involves compromise. However, that doesn’t mean that every decision should be based on price. It is okay to plan a budget-savvy wedding, but be careful not to become too strict; you might later wish you had planned a wedding more suited to your dreams. Here are two ways to tell if you might regret your cost-cutting ways.

You’re Settling

If you are settling on a place because it is the cheapest or choosing a wedding dress because it is on the clearance rack, you may want to reconsider what is important to you. Could you make coffee at home for the next few months instead of visiting the local coffee shop to help you pay for the dress you really want? Could you have the wedding on a Sunday or Friday to save money on the venue you really love? Compromise doesn’t have to mean settling for the cheapest option.

You’ve Become Obsessed

For some people, saving money can become an obsession. You get so excited about saving money that you focus all your attention on how much more you can save instead of focusing on the wedding plans . You are no longer choosing invitations or favors or flowers because they fit your wedding theme but because they are a good price. There is a line between budget-savvy and cheapskate. Try to stay on the right side.

There are plenty of ways to save money on a wedding. You don’t have to sacrifice the wedding of your dreams to make it happen. Instead, figure out which details are important to you and look for ways to cut spending in other areas of your life. Also, get creative with your wedding details. Just because you are on a budget doesn’t mean you have to wear a discounted dress in an unflattering style and host the reception at a venue with broken toilets. Find some balance and you can have a beautiful wedding and a healthy bank account.

Premarital Counseling: Is it for You?

Counseling often has a negative stigma attached to it prompting some couples to shy away from premarital counseling, but how do you know if it’s right for you? Attending premarital counseling seems like it is an admission of relationship issues, but in reality, it can help perfectly happy couples build even stronger marriages. With high divorce rates, many couples don’t have healthy role models to look to for guidance. Premarital counseling sessions can equip couples with the tools and knowledge to safeguard their marriages against stress, division, and disappointment. Here are four areas that can be improved by meeting with a counselor before the wedding….

Communication: The key to any healthy relationship is open and honest communication. Premarital counseling gives you the opportunity to express your fears, expectations, and anticipation about the upcoming wedding and marriage in a safe environment. By doing so, you and your soon-to-be spouse will learn how to effectively communicate with one another, an invaluable tool that will be needed throughout your lifetime together.

Expectations: Everyone has expectations about marriage, however common or unique, that have been picked up through the years from witnessing healthy and unhealthy relationships around them. Premarital counseling is the ideal place to discuss these expectations with your partner and eliminate future disappointment. Learning your mate’s expectations and sharing your own will equip you to build a marriage that’s equally satisfying to both of you.

Responsibilities: Each partner plays a significant role in the marriage, but how do you know what responsibilities your spouse is expecting you to take? Engaging in open dialog about the roles and responsibilities you’ll each take on will save you unnecessary frustration and disappointment down the road. Premarital counseling opens the door for you both to discuss and decide how you’ll divide the load, whether it’s with finances, cleaning, career, or child-rearing.

Values: By now, you probably have a very strong idea of where your partner stands on most issues, but what about things that may arise in the future? How do you want to raise children? Will you be dedicated to one religion? What are your views on family? These are huge issues that, when undecided, can place a huge strain on any relationship. A premarital counselor can open your eyes to the ideals that matter most to you as individuals and as husband and wife.

S**T Brides Say

A YouTube video called “S**T Brides Say” has gone viral. So far, the video has over 500,000 views.  The video good-heartedly pokes fun at the bizarre and amusing things brides say and do. Here are a few scenarios from the video that you are probably guilty of.

1)      Describing your wedding theme or style in confusing and contradicting terms. Sure, you know exactly what you mean when you say “vintage modern,” but people who are listening to you are probably wondering what exactly you’re talking about.

2)      Being insensitive to your bridesmaids and/or guests, a.k.a. being a Bridezilla. Sure, you just want your bridesmaids to look and feel beautiful on your big day, but suggesting they join a gym, get a make-over, etc. is not the best idea.

3)      Getting emotional when you find “the dress.” Of course, you are excited, but someone who doesn’t understand probably thinks you sound ridiculous.

4)      Overestimating your ability to DIY. Sometimes DIY wedding projects are a great way to save money and create unique wedding details, but brides-to-be are famous for taking on more projects than they can handle.

Wedding planning can be stressful, so take a moment to laugh. After you’d watch the video, we’d love to know which scenes reminded you of yourself.

Avoiding Conflict

Your wedding day is supposed to be magical and special, full of love and joy, but all too often, drama creeps in and conflict abounds. Here’s a few easy ways to avoid conflict on some hot-button issues.

How to avoid conflict…

When choosing bridesmaids: Whether you agree or not, there are probably a few people in your life who will naturally assume they’re going to be a part of your wedding party. Ultimately, this decision is up to you and you should never feel bullied into including someone in your wedding. Adding additional bridesmaids or groomsmen adds more stress (in keeping track of everyone), more expense (in the cost of gifts and rehearsal dinner), and, well, more people to the day. However, if you’re fearful that excluding someone will cause more trouble than it’s worth, there’s no hard and fast rule on the number of bridesmaids you can have. Or, simply ask that person to serve in another way, such as a program attendant, scripture reader, or honorary bridesmaid.

When determining the guest list: Narrowing down your wedding guest list can be tricky business, especially when you’re working hard to include friends, family, co-workers, and guests of your parents and future in-laws, but if you’re working within a budget, most likely, trimming the guest list is an absolute necessity. To avoid drama, allot a certain number of invites for your parents and in-laws. Then, sit down with your fiancé and begin categorizing your potential guests into lists based on importance and closeness. Worse case scenario, send out a first round of invites, wait for RSVPs, and then follow up with a second round of invites to less-close acquaintances.

When deciding whether or not to invite children: Choosing to host an adults-only affair, especially for your reception, is completely legitimate, but before you make the decision, think long and hard about the implications. If you have close relationships with a lot of children (i.e. nieces, nephews, cousins, friends with young kids), it might be hurtful to exclude them from your day. However, if you’re worried about your beautiful reception turning into a scene from Chuck E. Cheese, don’t back down on your stance about keeping the guest list to 18 and over. Instead of including the words “adults only” on your invitations, simply be sure to write only the names of invited guests on the envelopes (i.e. Mr. and Mrs. Smith, as opposed to the Smith family). If you notice that a family RSVPs for more guests than you included, simply call them and explain that the affair is strictly for adults.

When trying to involve your fiancé in the planning: Men often take a backseat when it comes to wedding planning for a number of reasons. Maybe they don’t care about floral arrangements, maybe they’re at a loss for what to do, or maybe they simply don’t realize you need or desire their help. Whatever the case, if you’d like your groom to get more involved in the wedding plans, simply explain to him how much you’d like his help. More importantly, give him specific tasks that he can coordinate, such as planning the honeymoon, choosing the playlist for the reception, or overseeing the food selection for the rehearsal dinner or reception.

first three steps of wedding planning

First Three Steps of Wedding Planning

First Three Steps of Wedding Planning

Here’s the first three steps in your countdown to “I Do!” Get started now by tackling these first wedding planning tasks.

So he popped the question…now what?

Unfortunately, for most newly engaged women – the excitement of finally finding “the one” is dampened by a hard dose of stress and anxiety. Sure, you’ll find about a gazillion wedding planning checklists out there, but they all tend to overwhelm more than they help, and all essentially fail to address the fundamental question: “Where do I begin?”

We’re here to help. After you’ve announced the exciting news and taken some time to bask in your newly engaged glow, it’s time to get cracking. Here are the first three wedding planning tasks you absolutely must accomplish before anything else.

Cross these items off your wedding checklist – and you’re on your way.

First Steps of Wedding Planning:

Step 1: Determine Your Budget

Every decision stems from the wedding budget. Before you can plan anything, you must know how much you can spend and who plans to contribute. Your budget will determine the type of wedding you can have – from how many guests you invite, to where and when you host your wedding, right down to the specific blooms in your bouquet. And with the ever increasing cost of weddings, financing the event is often a group effort; the bride’s parents no longer need to take out a second mortgage just to fund the upcoming nuptials. You’ll need to talk to your families about who will pay for what, and arrive at a total wedding budget. This complete wedding budget tracker will walk you through the process.

Step 2: Tackle the Guest List

Some “checklists” suggest setting a date and commencing other wedding plans before this step, but Elegala considers the guest count is the most vital decision after the budget. Here’s why: Capacity is one of the most important criteria in finding a suitable wedding venue – more so even than style and vision – and you must secure your location before you can successfully plan anything else. Trust us, cramming 300 people into a venue that seats 150 will not go over well. You don’t need to have the list finalized just yet, but you’ll need an estimate from both sides of the family (and yourselves) right away to avert countless planning headaches down the road.  This complete wedding guest guide will help you get started.

Step 3: Set a Site and Date

Only once you have an estimated budget and guest count can you begin searching for a place to hold your event with any accuracy. Remember – many reception sites book over a year in advance, so you really can’t decide on a wedding date until you have officially booked your venue with a signed contract. Find as many reception sites that meet your budget, capacity and overall style quotient as you can. Use our wedding reception site search to find venues in your area, and narrow down your list. Then schedule appointments to tour each wedding venue and meet with the manager. After that—it’s decision making time.

There is one wedding planning truism that we hold dear. As you may have heard it said, once you find your wedding venue, everything else falls into place. Once you have accomplished these steps, you will find the rest of your planning task list a piece of, ahem, wedding cake.

source: elegala.com