Wedding Vows

Writing your own wedding vows can be an incredibly romantic gesture and a creative way to make your ceremony unique. While personalized vows can make the nuptials more touching, they can also add to the stress leading up to the big day. If you and your fiancé are planning to craft your own vows, discuss it ahead of time and devise a plan.

Before you begin writing, make sure personalized vows are accepted by your officiant. Certain denominations require couples to use traditional vows during their ceremony. Once you get the green light, talk to your fiancé about your expectations. A lot of couples decide to write their vows together for cohesion. Writing your vows together will take the pressure off of each of you to live up to the other’s expectations. Plus, as an added bonus, it’s a great time to join together and reflect on your relationship, love, and commitments to one another.

If you decide to write your vows separately, discuss your plans ahead of time. Determine the style, length, and outline of the vows. Do you want humorous and charming vows, or serious and romantic? Figure out these details prior to writing to ensure that you and your fiancé are on the same page. Structure and flow is an important part of the vows. Figure out an outline that you both can follow. For example, maybe begin by discussing how you met, when you fell in love, or the wonderful traits your partner possesses before moving onto your promises and commitments.

To help keep you on track and guarantee uniformity among your vows, find samples online that you like. Use them as a reference for length, layout, order, or voice. Be sure to set aside an ample amount of time to compose your vows. This is a great opportunity for you to publicly profess your feelings, adoration, and devotion to your soon-to-be spouse. Give yourself enough time to gather your thoughts and clearly communicate your heart to your fiancé and wedding guests. Personalize your ceremony. Ceremony readings and vows.

Honoring A Loved One At Your Wedding

If a parent, grandparent, sibling, or close relative has passed away, there are a lot of wonderful ways to honor their memory at your wedding or reception. Here are some suggestions of ways to pay tribute to someone you have loved and lost:

1. Photo Table: Set up a special table at the wedding ceremony and/or reception filled with framed photos of your late loved one. Cover it with flowers or candles for an elegant, respectful display.

2. Candle Lighting: Make your late loved one a part of the wedding ceremony by lighting a candle in their honor. This can be done by another family member at the beginning of the ceremony or by you and your fiancé during the nuptials.

3. Mention: Ask your officiant to make mention of your remembered loved one during the wedding ceremony.

4. Program Insert: If you’re passing out printed programs for your wedding ceremony, include a special mention, letter, photo, anecdote, or poem dedicated to your deceased loved one.

5. Moment of Silence: Observe a moment of silence during the wedding ceremony or reception to honor the memory of the one you’ve lost.

6. Scripture/Letter/Poem Reading: During the ceremony or reception, have someone read the loved one’s favorite scripture or poem or a personal letter written by them during their life.

7. Toast: During your reception, honor the memory of your late loved one with a special toast given by you, your new spouse, or one of your family members.

8. Song: Honor the memory of your loved one by having their favorite song (or a song significant to you) performed or played at the ceremony or reception.

9. Personal Memento: Wear or carry something of significance to your lost loved one on your wedding day, whether it be a piece of jewelry, hair barrette, or a handkerchief.

Wedding Veil Alternatives

Years and years ago, brides wore veils, long veils.  It’s just what they did.  They wore a white wedding dress and veil.  And if you were an early trendsetter who decided to forgo the veil, you probably got a stern look of disapproval from your grandmother.  Now days, things are changing.  Don’t get us wrong, brides still loves veils, veils are still in, and veils are still very gorgeous.  But brides are beginning to expand their bridal headwear options to include baubles, headbands, flowers, vintage hair pieces, and much, much more.  Check out a few of our favorites!

Birdcage veils. For the bride who loves vintage or dramatic glamour, this is a fabulous option for you.  These stunning beauties have a classic elegance to them, while maintaining a sense of no fuss fashion.  There are tons of great options throughout Etsy.  Just search “birdcage veils” and you’ll be met with hundreds of options, each with great pictures and descriptions.  Still not sure you’re sold on the birdcage veil for the wedding day?  Think about using one in your bridal portraits for a dramatic and different look.

Brooches. These sparkly baubles give you the freedom to incorporate as much or as little bling as you want, as brooches come in every possible shape and size.  You can also incorporate hints of your wedding colors into these accessories, without overwhelming your entire look.  Lots of brides also take advantage of brooches as their something old or something borrowed, incorporating brooches from family members or dear friends.  Don’t have any brooches in the family?  Look at antique stores, vintage shops, and estate sales for older finds or scour jewelry shows for newer bling.  Brooches can be incorporated into almost any hair style…up, down, long, short, you name it!

Floral. The idea of flowers in the bride’s hair used to be reserved for destination weddings, but not anymore.  Brides everywhere are looking to nature to add a festive flair to their look.  Simple blooms look best, and white blooms create a look that is both polished and pretty.  Talk with your florist about what blooms might look best as well as what will be in season.  It is important to make sure the stem is long enough to slip a few bobby pins through, and if you would prefer to have your florist wrap a barrette or hair clip with the bloom, most are happy to do that for you.  And for the whimsical bride planning a garden party, why not do a wreath of baby’s breath?  A look fit for a princess, without being draped in diamonds.

Headbands. Once a thing for schoolgirls, headbands have come back onto the fashion scene in a big way the past few years.  Headbands are a fun way, yet hassle free way to add some fun to your bridal look.  And since headbands are so popular, look beyond the typical bridal stores.  Some of your favorite retailers such as Ann Taylor, J.Crew, Nordstrom, and Forever 21, make great headbands.

Custom hairpieces. Can’t decide what you want?  Thinking you want a little bit of everything, or maybe something with feathers, or maybe something you haven’t even actually seen yet?  Having a hair piece specifically designed for you is a special way to make a personal stamp on your bridal look.  Lo Boheme is one of our favorite places for custom hairpieces, as well as other wedding day accessories.  If the price tag is a bit high for you, invest some time looking around Etsy.  There are some incredibly talented people out there, just waiting to make the perfect hairpiece, just for you!

And if you’re not quite ready to give up on the veil, no worries!  Have the best of both worlds by wearing a veil for your ceremony and switching into one of the options above for your reception.  That way you can dance the night away hands and worry free! Wedding Veil Alternatives

A Stress Free Wedding Day

A Stress Free Wedding Day

A Stress Free Wedding Day

One of the most common things we hear from brides following their wedding day is, “Where did the day go?  It feels like a blur, so much happened, yet I can barely remember any of it.”  Unfortunately, much of this “memory loss” is due to stress on the big day.  Though stress and wedding planning often go hand in hand, stress and the wedding day do not.  Even when thorough planning takes place, many brides find themselves stressed and overwhelmed on the big day.  The day is too special and too important to be stressed, so we are offering a few simple tips to help you keep stress free on the big day.

Hire a wedding coordinator. Ok, we know, technically this is something that would have been done way before the wedding day, but we list this to highlight how valuable a coordinator is on the actual day of the wedding.  No matter how thorough and perfect the planning is, there will inevitably be last minute details that need to be taken care of.  The placement of the flower arrangements, the lighting of candles, the setting of tables, the timing of when ceremony seating begins…there is a lot to do, and if you try to take care of it all, you won’t be able to enjoy your day.  So, seriously consider a wedding planner so that when the flowers are late, when there are no matches in sight, and when you’re 25  napkins short, you won’t know a thing about it!

But if you can’t afford a wedding planner, don’t fret.  There is still a stress free way to deal with the details.  Think about a close friend or family member that you really trust.  Someone who is level headed, assertive, and efficient, and ask them if they would consider being the point-person on the wedding day.  The person that others come to with details and crises, the person who carries out your wedding day vision, and the person who solves those little stressors without mentioning them to you.  Perhaps a maid of honor could fill this role.  Regardless of who you chose, spend time with them the week before the wedding talking about your vision (i.e. how things will be set up, the schedule for the day, etc.) so that they can execute your vision while you stay stress free!

A Stress Free Wedding DayCreate a day of timeline. What things do you want or need to get done the day of the wedding?  A bridesmaids brunch, a special time with your family, manicures, makeup, hair…there may be a variety of things you want to do on your big day.  Write these things down, think about how long each thing will take, and then create a schedule.  Plan in thirty minute increments and leave yourself some cushion time with each activity.  Consider emailing this schedule to your wedding party a week before the wedding so they know what to expect and how they can help you stay on schedule. Be sure to check out the Music By Design event timeline for all your important details.

Have people come to you. Are you getting your hair done?  How about your makeup?  If so, consider having these vendors come to where you and your wedding party are getting ready.  This will cut down on travel time, traffic, unknown delays, and of course, stress!

Get ready at the wedding site. This stress free tip isn’t always possible, but when it is, consider primping at the ceremony site.  Lots of venues have bride and groom suites for each respective wedding parties to get ready in.  This cuts down on last minute rushing, people getting lost, and of course, your stress level!  It can also help set the wedding day tone earlier in the day.

Put your phone away. Though many of us are attached to our cell phones, consider detaching, at least for your wedding day.  Guests will get lost, friends will be late, and kids will get sick.  These things happen.  These things also prompt a lot of people to call you to tell you about them.  Though it might be nice to have a heads up, it will also likely lead to unnecessary stress.  You won’t be able to change whatever is going on, and there is likely another guest they can call for directions.  So for your big day, we encourage you to tuck your phone away and enjoy a stress free wedding day!

Ceremony Music Tips

All About Ceremony Music
Hiring Your DJ to Play During Your Ceremony Makes Sense and Saves Money. A string quartet will run you between $300 and $500 per hour. Your DJ will charge you between $100 and $300 to run your ceremony.

When it comes to planning your wedding, a lot of attention is paid to the reception part of the day, but there’s also quite a bit to be considered when it comes to the ceremony itself.  One key question you may be asking yourself is, “Who will be providing the music for the ceremony?”  If you are having your ceremony at the same site as your reception, chances are your DJ will gladly provide music of your choice for your ceremony for considerably less (or at no charge) than it would cost to hire a string quartet or other musicians.

Live music is beautiful, but when you are on a budget, prerecorded high-quality digital versions are just as effective.  Your DJ will also have the microphones needed for your officiant and any readings you may have during your ceremony.

In terms of the music, you have unlimited options.  Some couples prefer traditional music and others prefer more contemporary options that reflect their personal taste.

The following are some examples in Ceremony Music Tips:


Traditional

Canon in D
Jesu, Joy of Man’s Desiring
Ave Maria
The Four Seasons: Spring
Lohengrin: Bridal Chorus
Midsummer’s Night Dream: Wedding March

Contemporary

Storybook Love from the movie “The Princess Bride”
When I’m Sixty-Four: The Beatles
Over the Rainbow: Israel “IZ” Kamakawiwoʻole
All I Want Is You: U2
Lovers in Japan: Coldplay
Lucky: Jason Mraz
Into The Mystic: Van Morrison

For a great mix of traditional meets contemporary, look into the Vitamin String Quartet.  They perform classic string versions of music for hundreds of artists – from The Beatles to Guns ‘N’ Roses.

Also, be sure to check out Fred Benedetti for some great instrumental guitar selections.

To make your ceremony easier to envision, the following is a sample of a timeline including notes where a special song is typically played.

Ceremony Timeline

Guests arriving and seated by ushers (ushers distributing programs) Prelude music playing

Ceremony begins

1. Groom and officiant processional Select a Song
2. Grandparents then parents processional (Select a song – usually same song as number 1)
3. The parents will light the candles (if you decide on a unity candle)
4. Bridal party processional Select a Song
5. Bride’s processional Select a Song
6. Bride and groom give flowers to the parents (optional) Select a Song
7. Readings (this is not as popular these days)
8. Vows
9. Unity candle or sand ceremony Select a Song
10. Bride and groom recessional Select a Song

Personalize Your Wedding Ceremony

Personalize your Wedding Ceremony

It’s all about you; take back your ceremony! It is a ritual – time honored and sacred – but that does not mean your wedding ceremony has to be like every other. Of course, some couples choose to be extremely original and opt for exchanging vows on a roller coaster, while bungee jumping or even dressed as trekies. We say – good for them for such uninhibited displays of originality. But even if you prefer a more traditional and “scream-free” wedding ceremony, you can still add a touch of personality.

Location
Not every wedding ceremony must take place in a house of worship. Outdoor locations and other types of ceremony sites can make for ceremonies that are both spiritual and memorable.  Consult our list of unique ceremony site ideas for inspiration.

Refreshments
Welcome and refresh your guests by serving lemonade, iced tea or water. It’s a nice touch, and your guests will appreciate the gesture. Depending on the season or nature of your wedding, you can use your refreshment of choice to tie in the theme or style of the day.

Personalized Pew/Row Decorations
Who says your ceremony decorations must be floral? How about draping framed photographs of the bride and groom tied with ribbon over the ends of each row? Our post about wedding flowers can help you create a unique and memorable decor scheme.

Customize your Wedding Programs
Summer brides – how about the shape of a fan? Or keep the shape and style traditional, and include personal letter or poem to add some interest to this often overlooked detail. This complete wedding programs guide offers even more ideas to get your creative juices flowing.

The Grand Entrance
There are other ways to make your entrance beyond the traditional march with your father. Ride in on a horse. Or be escorted by both parents, a close uncle, brother, friend—even a pet! Here is a list of grand introduction songs.

Personalized Aisle Runner
You will know this is your ceremony while walking down the isle on a runner personalized with your monogram or logo.

Beyond “Here Comes the Bride”
If walking down the isle to the same song as thousands of brides before you doesn’t sound appealing, there’s no reason why your favorite tune can’t make a memorable substitute!

Mix up the Bridal Party
Who says your maid of honor must be a “maid?” If your best pal happens to be a guy, have a “man of honor.” Same goes for the best man; there’s no reason why there can’t be a “best woman.”

Not Crazy about the Unity Candle? Try the Sand Ceremony
Instead, combine sand into a beautiful bowl or vase. The sand can be of two colors, creating a visual representation of the joining of two families and something you can keep and cherish forever. You can purchase a sand ceremony kit in our wedding store.

Write your own Wedding Vows, Readings, Poems
Nothing puts that special personalized stamp on a ceremony quite like vows and readings prepared by the bride and groom themselves. These spoken words expose your mind and your heart to each other and to your audience.  Get started with these tips on writing your wedding vows.



Cash Saving Tips For Your Ceremony

Great Ways to Save on Your Wedding Ceremony

Site Savings

Two in One
Many reception venues also host on-site ceremonies. The ceremony fee may be built into the cost of the reception or tack on a minimal expense.  Hosting both events in the same location will also save on transportation expenses.
Honor Your Faith

If you have a strong religious affiliation, your house of worship will likely host your wedding ceremony. This is good news for your budget, since members of the organization can usually rent the space free-of-cost (although a donation is a nice gesture).

Décor Deductions

Something Borrowed
Plan your wedding near a major religious holiday when your place of worship is decked with festive décor. “Borrowing” your ceremony décor means one less detail to plan – and one less item to purchase.

Simplfy Your Site
Overdone decorations are unnecessary for a brief ceremony. Keep décor elements simple (and cost-effective), and save the pricey arrangements for the reception – as this is where your guests will spend the majority of time. For example, strategically placed candles set a romantic ambiance and cost considerably less than flowers.

Go Natural
Cut décor costs further by exchanging vows in a naturally beautiful location. A garden wedding hardly needs additional floral arrangements, while an ornate church may be breathtaking on its own

Music Markdowns

Alternatives
Ceremony musicians can tack on an extra $500-$1000 if you’re not careful. Consider some alternatives and pocket the extra cash for your reception entertainment.

Hire your reception DJ to accompany your ceremony as well. Vendor pricing is much easier to negotiate when you purchase multiple services or package deals. Music By Design, Ltd. charges $100 for a ceremony ‘satellite sytem‘ – this compares to $300 to $500 per hour for a string trio.

source: elegala.com

Ceremony Readings and Vows

Popular Passages

Let some of these favorite ceremony readings inspire you while writing your wedding vows or customizing your ceremony with wedding readings.

If you’re personalizing your wedding ceremony with meaningful readings, delve into the world of literature, poetry, quotes and lyrics for inspiration. Spend some time at the library reading works by your favorite authors; listen to lyrics from songs that moved you—even consult Hollywood for some lines that strike an emotional chord.

This list of popular wedding ceremony readings will get you started.
Wedding Readings from Poetry

William Shakespeare – “Romeo and Juliet”

My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite. William Shakespeare – “Sonnet 116”

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
Love’s not Time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle’s compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Wilferd Peterson – The Art of Marriage

The little things are the big things.
It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say, “I love you” at least once a day.

It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
it should continue through all the years.

It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives.
It is standing together facing the world.
It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family.
It is doing things for each other,
not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice,
but in the spirit of joy.

It is speaking words of appreciation,
and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo
or the wife to have the wings of an angel.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience,
understanding and a sense of humor.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
It is giving each other an atmosphere
in which each can grow.

It is finding room for the things of the Spirit.
It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
It is establishing a relationship in which
the independence is equal, dependence is mutual,
and the obligation is reciprocal.

It is not only marrying the right partner,
it is BEING the right partner.
This is “The Art of Marriage”
Wedding Readings from Cultural Heritage

Irish Wedding Blessing

May God be with you and bless you
May you see your children’s children
May you be poor in misfortunes,
Rich in blessings
May you know nothing but happiness
From this day forward

Apache Wedding Blessing

Now you will feel no rain,
For each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
For each of you will be warmth to each other.
Now there is no more loneliness for you,
For each of you will be comfort to the other.
Though you are two bodies,
There is but one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place,
To enter into the days of your togetherness.
And, may the days of your life
Be good and long upon the earth.
Wedding Readings from Hollywood

When Harry Met Sally

I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

To Love and Be Loved

We come to love not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

Moulin Rouge

The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

The Notebook

The best love is the kind that weakens the soul, that makes us reach for more, that plants fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that’s what you’ve given me. That’s what I hope to give to you forever.

The Notebook

Poets often describe love as an emotion that we can’t control, one that overwhelms logic and common sense. That’s what it’s like for me. I didn’t plan on falling in love with you, and I doubt that you planned on falling in love with me. But once we met, it was clear that neither of us could control what was happening to us. We fell in love, despite our differences, and once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me love like that has happened only once, and that’s why every minute we spent together has been seared in my memory. I’ll never forget a single moment of it.
Wedding Readings from Song Lyrics

Etta James – At Last

At last
my love has come along
my lonely days over
and life is like a song

At last
the skies above are blue
well my heart was wrapped up in clover
the night I looked at you

I found a dream
that I could speak to
a dream that I could call my own
I found a thrill
to press my cheek to
a thrill that I have never known

At last
You are mine
At last

Rascal Flatts – Bless the Broken Road

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn’t see how every sign pointed straight to you

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you

source: elegala.com