Personalized wedding vows add romance and originality to any wedding ceremony, but they’re not for everyone. Some couples choose to recite traditional vows that have been used for generations, while other couples enjoy putting a customized spin on their commitment to one another. Before you decide to write you own wedding vows, ask yourself these simple questions:
Are they permissible? As crazy as it sounds, certain denominations prohibit couples from using personalized vows during the wedding ceremony. Once you settle on a ceremony site, ask your officiant if you’re required to use traditional vows on your wedding day.
Will you write them together? Some couples prefer to keep their vows under wraps until the wedding day, keeping their spouse-to-be in the dark. If you and your fiancé decide to write your own wedding vows, discuss whether or not you’d like to write something cohesive together or compose something separately for one another.
What style will you use? It’s imperative that you and your fiancé determine what style the vows will be, especially if you’re planning to write them independently. Some couples prefer romantic and serious vows, while others like to incorporate humor and charm. Regardless of what you choose, make sure you’re on the same page so your vows have the same feel and neither one of you is disappointed on the wedding day.
What’s the structure? Determine an outline for the vows that you both can follow so they’re structured and cohesive. Maybe start with a short anecdote about how you met, when you knew he/she was the one, or what you love about each other, before diving into your vows, promises, and commitments.
How long will it take? There’s no way to predict how long it will take you to write what will be, undoubtedly, one of the most important promises of your life. What’s important is that you give yourself plenty of time! Don’t put off the vow writing until the day before the wedding. Get started earlier so you have ample time to organize your thoughts and communicate everything you want to say to your future spouse.