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Unwanted Guests

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Guests You Don’t Want to Invite…But Should
There will always be those unwanted guests that you are obligated to invite to the wedding. If you are receiving financial assistance from your parents or future in-laws- expect this situation to pop up, maybe more than once. However, there are just some people you will have to learn to accept are coming to your wedding even if you aren’t thrilled about the concept. There are five exceptions to the rule that you should (re)consider when sending out those invites. They include:
1) Your Debbie Downer Friend
She’s anti-social, and worse a wedding hater. Sure, you can love her regardless, but will she be so welcoming and open to the L-O-V-E concept on YOUR big day? Well, let’s hope so! If you are considering inviting the wedding basher, sit down with her prior to the event and feel out her mood as to how she feels about coming to your special day. We hope she will put her own feelings aside about marriage and come support you in your decision of marrying the man of your dreams.
2) Your Boss
I’m sure they have heard every little detail of your big day, and it doesn’t seem right to NOT invite them. I even bet you’ve probably done a bit of online perusing for your wedding in general on work time. And, I’m sure they are very aware of this. It’s a traditional concept to invite your boss, but the people you spend the most time with are your coworkers and boss they should be included if your guest list allows for the people. After all, this is the person that decides your salary and PTO!
3) Your Parent’s Best Friends Forever
Sure, you’ve known Mr. and Mrs. So and So for years and years, but do you really want them at your wedding? This is one of those sticky situations because I’m sure your parents have probably attended their daughters or son’s weddings. Think of it this way, I’m sure you’re parents feel like they would have a fun time with them and they will be generous to you in their gift-giving.
4) Extended Cousins
If you have a ginormous family, consider having some hard and fast rules about the guest list-“No second cousins under the age of 18” or “No second cousins at all.” Some of these little details will help keep the list short and sweet and your sanity! However, let’s say you have a very close second cousin to you that is your age range, and you are very close with her. Well, she makes the cut off, right? You don’t have to explain yourself, but if people question you at least you have rules in place!
5) Mr. Slick Rick
The last unwanted guest you should consider inviting includes you fiance’s “interesting” friends. This can include the Casanova who will hit on anything with a pulse. This guy seems to be funny and endearing when you all are out in a group setting; however, it does not seem too appealing at your wedding. Prior to the event you can respectfully ask your husband-to-be if he’d have a word with his friend and ask him to be on his best behavior.
There’s no right or wrong guest list and unwanted guests can make the wedding awkward. But also keep in mind this is your day and no matter how they try to undermine it, all eyes are on you and your groom!

How to Help Wedding Guests Save Money on Hotel Rooms

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Whether you have a lot of out of town guests, are hosting a destination wedding or just have guests who don’t want to drive after the reception, many of your wedding guests may ask your advice on reserving a hotel room. Most likely, they will ask you where to book a room as well how to save money at local hotels. A 2007 report done by Smith Travel Research revealed that the average U.S. hotel room price is now over $100 per night, so many guests may be concerned about cost. However, don’t get discouraged. According to Daniel from ChicagoHotels.org, there are two easy ways your out of town guests can save money on a hotel room.

Consider Business Hotels

According to Daniel, hotels that cater to business guests often offer discounts on the weekends. This is because their main clientele only need rooms during the week. It is a basic example of supply and demand. During the week, prices are higher because demand is higher. However, on the weekends, prices are lower because demand is lower. To find a hotel that typically caters to business travelers, simply do a little online research and make a few phone calls to local hotels. You may want to make a list of hotels in your area that typically cater to business professionals and then share this information with your wedding guests.

Wait Until the Last Minute

It is common knowledge that waiting until the last minute is the best way to score great travel deals. This applies to everything from hotel rooms to flights. This is because companies lose money if they do not fill up their hotel rooms or plane seats, so they are willing to offer steep discounts to fill up those seats at the last minute. The downside to this approach is risking the possibility of not being to get a hotel room or flight that meshes with your wedding schedule. Avoid this tactic if you are planning a wedding on a holiday weekend. Travel arrangements are best made in advance for busy weekends. However, this may be a good option for local guests who don’t want to drive home after the wedding because they can always make other arrangements if they have trouble finding a room.

While you can share helpful information with your wedding guests, you are not responsible for booking the rooms for them. Give them the information they need to make an informed decision that fits with their personal finances; then let them handle the rest. After all, you are planning a wedding!

Attending a Wedding Reception as a Guest: A DJ’s Perspective

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Attending a Wedding Reception as a Guest: A DJ’s Perspective

As a professional DJ with Music By Design, Ltd., my calendar is booked between now and the end of the year with wedding receptions.  Every weekend is different, fun and exciting.  I have the opportunity to play music customized to each couple’s taste, observe family traditions, and orchestrate the evening and deliver a memorable and enjoyable event for everyone involved.

Recently, I had the opportunity to attend a wedding as a member of the bridal party.  The couple was using a DJ who was working as an independent contractor for a large DJ company based in Naperville.  Clearly, the couple did not know the DJ was an independent contractor – most DJ ‘booking agents’ lie about that part.  Because of Music By Design’s attention to detail and commitment to stellar customer service, I was eager to see how this DJ would perform.  Needless to say, I was observing with a critical eye and ear.

The first thing that struck me was that the DJ was not prepared with the proper equipment to run the audio for the couples’ video montage, even though the couple had made arrangements for with DJ company in advance.  Fortunately, Music By Design’s office was not very far away and I drove to get the proper equipment.  Since the DJ was not accountable for the quality of service (he is an independent contractor), there was obviously a communication breakdown between the couple, the company (booking agent), and the actual DJ.

The next thing that I found unsettling was that he had the wrong bridal party introduction music cued up.  Luckily, I clarified with him moments before he was going to begin and had him change the song to the bride and groom’s selection.  In some cases, perhaps the introduction music is not a big deal, but in this instance the groom was a big Chicago White Sox fan and wanted the party to come out to ACDC’s “Thunderstruck.”  Any other song would have fallen short of his expectations for this big moment.

Next, there was an issue with the dinner music.  When a Music By Design DJ plays dinner music, we hand select songs based on the musical taste of the couple and their guests.  We remain at the DJ booth and actively select music to accommodate the bride and groom.  This DJ put on Michael Buble and let it play through – even allowing the songs to loop (play the same song over and over).  I am not knocking Michael Buble, I think he’s great, but I would have mixed it up with various artists.  To put music on “loop” is cheating the guests and the couple and leads people to wonder, “Why not just plug in an iPod?”.  When a couple is spending over $1,000 for a DJ, they deserve a DJ that is going to “actively DJ” the entire night.

Next, there was an issue with the first dances.  The bride and groom’s dance went smoothly as did the father-daughter dance, but when the DJ played the mother-son song, he began to replay the bride and groom’s song.  Not only was it embarrassing to have to stop the dance and have the groom walk to the DJ booth, but then the DJ did not have the custom song that the groom had requested.  As far as I am concerned, that is completely unacceptable.  How is it possible to not have the mother-son dance? That is what happens when independent contractors are invovled.

At this point, I wanted to try to let go, have a few cocktails and enjoy myself.  After all, it’s not often that I get to party and dance at a wedding.  So, the dance floor opened up around 9:15 p.m. and I put on my dancing shoes.  I was determined to have a good time no matter what and I did, but, I know for a fact that the bride and groom submitted a detailed list of must play songs and I was not hearing any of those songs.  What I was hearing was a very cookie cutter, run of the mill, been-there-done-that, stale list of traditional wedding reception songs.  Oh, we heard, “We are Family”, “Celebration”, “YMCA”, “Shout”… you probably know them just as well as I do.  Now, there’s nothing wrong with these songs.  I am not trying to sound like a pretentious music snob.  I am simply noting that this bride and groom requested specific songs and not many of them were played until the groom spoke with the DJ. All they got was the same cookie cutter wedding music as another couple got the weekend before that, and the weekend before that, and so on.   There was nothing unique about the music selections…even though the bride and groom were told they can choose their music.    Did people dance and have fun?  Yes, they did.  Did I hear people comment that the DJ wasn’t very good?  Yes, I did.

Bottom line: Always know what you are getting if you book a company using independent contractors. Also, learn how to identify a company that uses independent contractors (most of these DJ companies ‘booking agents’ try to hide it).  Chances are, they are accustomed to playing the same music week in and week out and will not go above and beyond in terms of customer service.