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Save the Date Cards

Save the Date Cards
Save the date cards are a relatively new trend in weddings, and they came about as a way to respect guests’ time and make sure they can attend the wedding. In good etiquette, you’ll send these to your guests 6 to 8 months before your wedding date so that your guests can mark it on their calendars and make travel arrangements. They should be sent out even sooner, up to a year in advance, if you are having a destination wedding or during a high travel season. For instance, Cape Cod in the summer, San Diego during Comic-Con International, Mexico in the winter during peak travel season or perhaps Washington, DC during an inauguration. If you are getting married in a relatively small town, you’ll still have to check, you might end up competing with hotel rooms with the annual Scarecrow Fest.
The point of using Save the Date cards is to be gracious to your guests by giving them enough time with their busy
schedules so that they can make travel arrangements well enough in advance and maybe use those airline and credit card points. Save the Date card notices are also used for non destination weddings if more than 25% of your guests are coming in from out of town and your event coincides with a peak travel season.
You should include the following information on your Save the Date card:
Couples full names
Wedding date
Location
A wedding Website is a nice addition for guests to click for more details as they are updated. A few things to avoid are not putting enough information and who to send them too. Always make sure you include the wedding location, such as your hometown or a destination wedding locale, along with the date so that guests can make travel arrangements. Just having the date is not enough. Guests need to know how many days they’ll need to take off of work. Send only to guests you are for certain you want in attendance.You can’t send a Save the Date card and then not send them an invite. After you drop off your save-the-dates at the post office, sit back, take a deep breath and feel better that you’ve crossed one more item off your to-do list. You’re one step closer to saying “I do!”

Receiving Line Etiquette

Receiving Line Etiquette
To Receive or Not to Receive?
Receiving line etiquette is something all brides and grooms need to think about.  Having a receiving line is almost always the right choice and it’s almost mandatory if you have over 50 people attending your wedding. If you take the time to stand in the receiving line, you ensure that you have at least some contact with each of your wedding guests. It’s a wonderful opportunity to receive congratulations and say thank you.
Who’s In It?
The answer to this question depends on who is in the wedding party and who is hosting. Who’s in a receiving line will also differ depending on the formality level of the wedding. The most formal of receiving lines will include, in order:
Parents of the Bride
Groom and Bride
Parents of the Groom
The Maid of Honor and Best Man
Don’t over talk during your receiving line, as guests will feel obligated to speak a few words with everyone therein. More conversation taking place means a longer wait time for everyone involved, from guests to the bride and groom. Everyone will have a chance to mingle during the reception, so keep your receiving line abbreviated.
When Do We Receive?
The receiving line participants will usually line upjust after the completion of the ceremony so that they can greet guests as they exit the ceremony venue or ceremony space. Less popular but just as proper is the receiving line that takes place just prior to the start of the reception. When planning your receiving line, consider space constraints and time constraints. If your ceremony venue is tiny, it may be better to line up and greet people as they enter your ceremony venue. Common receiving line sites include lobbies,staircases that lead outside, a front porch, the cocktail lounge, and the reception space itself.
As the bride (or groom) it is your responsibility to introduce guests unknown to your parents and spouse, and the receiving line is a great place to do this. You don’t have to give anyone’s life story— names and their relationship to you and your sweetie will suffice. Guests have a responsibility in the receiving line, as well.
Your wedding guests should introduce themselves by name to anyone in the receiving line who they do not
already know. Again, introductions should be brief all around since they’ll be plenty of time to get to know one another in more detail later.
Do I Still Need to Visit Every Table?
No, though brides and grooms should certainly make every attempt to mingle with their wedding guests. The reception is a great place to have a more intimate conversation or catch up with family and friends who came from out of town.

Kid Free Zone

Kid Free Zone
Sometimes a wedding is for adults only. A kid free zone just makes it easier on the bride and groom and the place hosting the event. If an invitation says to Mr. and Mrs. Joe Schmoe, that does not mean Mr.and Mrs. Joe Schmoe and Sally, Suzy and Sam. We should assume (rather, we should know) that kids probably aren’t invited to this wedding since their names are not specifically address on the invite. Similarly, if you, your significant other, and your son are addressed and invited to attend a wedding as guests that does not mean your son’s girlfriend is granted a free ride to the party.
Make it clear to all others, definitely on the invitation and verbally if necessary, that sorry sir but no kids allowed.Weddings aren’t a throw together high school bash, but instead the result of months and sometimes years of planning and need I point out the obvious, they cost lots of moolah.  Perhaps money was tight, or the guest list was already over capacity and the groom had to invite his stepsister’s husband. Whatever the reason, respect the bride and groom’s wishes and don’t try to smuggle in your kids like it’s no biggie. Once they get there, they are guests and will need somewhere to sit and something to eat. And people will notice. Remember being a guest at a wedding is not a right but a privilege.

 

There is always another side too. Here’s the scene: a 20-year-old single mother are invited to your college roommates wedding. She has a six-year-old son who Grandma and Grandpa can’t possibly babysit and doesn’t see any other alternative to the situation. What to do? She should call the bride and explain her situation. Ask her if there are any exceptions she’d be willing to make. Some people don’t want kids at their wedding because kids can be sticky, disruptive, and loud, etc. However, and this is a big however, most brides don’t want kids at their wedding simply because they said so. They’re the bride, that’s what they want, and there doesn’t have to be a reason.  Whatever the issue do it with class and dignity and if all else fails, everyone usually understands that moms have to stay at home with the kids. Unless you’re in the wedding, this is just as valid an excuse as the bride requesting her wedding be a kid free zone.

Bad Etiquette

Dealing with Bad Etiquette from Family and Friends
You are bound to see bad etiquette at some point or another throughout the wedding planning process. Etiquette can
come in the form of the proper way to congratulate you, telling you how to run your day, becoming a prima donna with special requests galore, and/or having uncouth behavior or actions.
So your third cousin comes out of the woodwork and asks if she is invited. Well, not everyone has the manner and
grace as you my darling. And it’s tactless to assume. It’s hard to try and invite everyone, but I assume your third
cousin probably is not going to make the cut. You should be honest, and let them know that you are having a small, intimate wedding and unfortunately you cannot invite extended family. Hopefully, she will understand.
Yes, you want to make sure your guests are comfortable, well accommodated, and of course, having fun. However,
when your step-grandma demands that you serve Pellegrino instead of tap water and that she only eats organic, gluten-free; tell you can accommodate her diet certainly on the gluten-free part, especially if she has Celiac Disease.
All other requests are a bit lofty, and to ask you is completely rude. If they have a food allergy or sensitivity, absolutely 100% without a doubt you should make sure they are well-cared for. Otherwise, they can pass on whatever they don’t prefer that is served to them.Let’s say that you’ve sent out your invites…and it was sent to

“Miss Joanna Smith.” However, the RSVP card reads“Miss Joanna Smith +1.” Um, so your friend thinks she is now running the guest list. How awesome of her. Is she also paying for +1’s food and drinks? Simply tell your friend this is not allowed. Unfortunately the invitation was only addressed to her, and not her plus a guest. Hopefully,she will understand.
Some of these things may and may not sound familiar to you. If they do, be gracious, honest, and hopefully your family and friends will understand. This day is about the bride and groom.
How to Address Your Wedding Guests

How to Address Your Wedding Guests

The rules for wedding related paper products (i.e. invitations, save the dates, and the like) are a little less formalized nowadays. However, there are still guidelines you should follow when sending along your love mail! According to Emily Post, here are some rules that you should follow:

  • Save the dates should be sent six to nine months in advance of the big day.
  • Wedding Invitations should be sent six to eight weeks in advance.
  • Double check the names on your guest list before the envelopes are addressed, to be sure they are spelled correctly.
  • There are many guidelines to addressing your guests, see below for more.
  • No abbreviations or initials are used when addressing formal invitations.

Here is a cheat sheet for all engaged couples whom may be experiencing pangs of confusion on how to address your wedding guests – some people have fancy titles like doctor and judge.
How to Address Your Wedding Guests

How to Address Your Guests

To a Married Couple

Even if you aren’t close with both members of the couple, you still need to include both names on the outer envelope. Guests rely on the outer envelope to determine who exactly is invited. For example:

Mr. John and Mrs. Carrie Preston

Or

Mr. and Mrs. John Preston
1234 Park Avenue
New York City, New York 11238

On the inner envelope, lose the first names or the titles and last names if you’re very close with the couple:

The Inner Envelope

Formal invitations are always slipped into an unsealed inner envelope to be placed inside the outer envelope. They are addressed in a more informal fashion — typically only title abbreviations and last name — and include the names of all invitees at the address, including children. For example: Mr. and Mrs. Estonia & Farrah, Gilbert, and Harriet

Mr. and Mrs. Preston or John and Carrie

To a Married Couple that (Different Last Names)

List the person you’re closest with first on the outer and inner envelope. If you’re similarly acquainted with both, list them in alphabetical order.

Mr. John Preston and Mrs. Carrie Bradshaw

To an Unmarried Couple Living Together

Like a married couple, both names should be included on the envelope, but in this case, each name gets its own line.

Mr. David Hirsch
Ms. Samantha Jones
1234 Benoit Road
Plano, Texas 75023

Again, go for alphabetical order if you know the couple well. If you’re primarily friends with only one member of the couple, it’s completely acceptable to address the outer envelope to that person and include “and Guest” or that person’s name on the inner envelope:

Mr. Hirsch and Ms. Jones or Mr. Hirsch and Guest

To a Same-Sex Couple

Use the same rules as you would for any other unmarried or married couple. If the couple is married or lives together, list them on the same line:
Ms. Celine Dion and Ms. Jacqueline Laurita

Or simply list their full names on the same line without titles.

Celine Dion and Jacqueline Laurita

On the inner envelope, use titles and last names:

Ms. Dion and Ms. Laurita

Or you can skip titles and simply address it to their first names.

To a Married Woman Doctor or Two Married Doctors

If a woman uses her maiden name professionally and socially, the outer envelope should read:

Dr. Addison Montgomery and Mr. David Thompson

Or, if she uses her husband’s name socially:

Dr. Addison and Mr. David Thompson

If both parties are doctors, you can address the outer envelope:

The Drs. Thompson or Drs. Addison and David Thompson

The same format is followed for other distinguished titles, such as reverend and honorable.

To Children and Families

Younger guests can be included on the inner envelope of their parents’ invitation by their name(s) or “and Family” — although the latter is easier to misinterpret.

Mr. and Mrs. Tom Ford
Daniel, Jeffrey, Brittany, and Kelly

Or

Mr. and Mrs. Tom Ford and Family

To Children 18 and Older

They should receive their own invitations, although siblings over 18 can be sent a joint invitation, in which case the outer envelope should include their names alphabetically on individual lines:

Miss Audrey Abraham
Miss Lily Abraham
Mr. Jack Abraham

If you don’t include “and Family” or each child’s name, you’re implying that children are not invited. That said, don’t be surprised if some guests still mistakenly assume their children are welcome. If you’re concerned this will happen with your guests, ask your immediate family and bridal party to help spread the word that the wedding will be adults-only. In the end, you may have to follow up with guests who don’t get the message via phone to gently explain the situation.

 

Lizzie Post

7 Wedding Tips From Lizzie Post

wedding eLizzie Post, the granddaughter of the famed etiquette queen, Emily Post, was recently featured on Style me Pretty with a few choice tips for brides and grooms on the rules of wedded bliss.  While so many of those old rules have been thrown out the window and modern couples are encouraged to be themselves and use their big day as an expression of their couple’s style, being gracious and polite absolutely NEVER goes out of style. We like the idea of keeping some of these key tips in mind and always embodying the utmost in manners especially during such an important time in your life.  Here is the roundup of our favorite money-saving and money savvy tips for the ultra modern bride! Enjoy!

 

1. It’s not polite to ask for cash, so subtly hint. Parents and the bridal party can spread the word too.

2. No. 1 rule of budgeting: start with the wedding guest list. An intimate gathering is a chic way to stay on budget.

3. It’s OKto reward yourself! When making those big vendor payments, try and choose a credit card instead of a check and earn cash back.

4. Tactfully negotiate with vendors through prioritization. An experienced vendor can stretch the budget if he/she knows what matters most to you.

5. Wedding Vendors are integral to your day, so always be kind, thank them for their help and services, and make prompt payments. Set up mobile alerts to ensure you don’t forget outstanding invoices.

6. Locally source your wedding. It’s eco-friendly and budget-friendly, while ensuring that your meal, wine and flowers are as fresh as possible.

7. With the average cost of a new wedding gown between $1,000-1,800, it’s perfectly acceptable and sensible to rent, borrow or purchase a pre-owned wedding dress.

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HazeltonHazelton Photography